Yep, Another Submission Blog

I love writing this blog: it's incredibly cathartic, creative, a fantastic conversation starter and, well, just plain fun, but there are moments when I do think that it's an egotistical orgy of self examination.

Sometimes it makes me grimace. I can write a post one day and then have to sneak back the next to delete it because it now sounds too cringey or just over the top self-absorbed.

But, on the whole, the good outweighs the bad. One of the great things about a blog is that you're not setting yourself up as an expert, just as a commentator. So, if someone disagrees with you, it really doesn't matter. It's all down to personal opinion and your own personal journey in the end.

A vanilla friend of mine knows I have an interest in Submission and she asked to try and explain it, but of course it's a difficult thing to do for someone with no grasp of the lifestyle whatsoever. Perhaps I should have sent her here...

I have always had to write. It's something I do every day. I start with the Morning Pages that artist Julia Cameron talks about in The Artist's Way. The idea is that you write three pages (mine are A4) of stuff...whatever comes into your head....first thing in the morning. Sometimes this can be more like a brain dump ("I must do this and I think that..") but occasionally, once all the daily rubbish is out there and dealt with, some magical bits and pieces come through.

I have been doing this for three years now and although I don't manage to make every morning, it is a regular part of my routine and I cherish it.

My chosen method of writing has varied over time. About two years ago I picked up a collection of Walt Whitman's poems and ended up writing poetry for a year, so inspired was I by his work. I have fallen in love and written a whole novel for someone...almost one hundred thousand words in six months. At times I wasn't sure whether I was having a love affair with the man or the book I was writing for him.

But blogging is a new experience for me. I make sure to spend time reading other bloggers' work as I find it fascinating on both a literary and DS level. When I notice that they've made a new post a lovely little thrill of anticipation steals over me. It would be the ultimate accolade someone thought the same thing about my own.

I have someone in my life who doesn't get the overwhelming need to write. He thinks it is a waste of time..."intellectual masturbation" was phrase he used. Indeed, it's the same person who doesn't understand the non-Vanilla part of me; who thinks that it's spending time in a fantasy world that will ultimately lead to disaster. At the same time, my desire for both is becoming stronger.